Grief rears its ugly head

This year I have suffered many losses. My grand mother died 3 years ago. My cousin recently passed from breast cancer my uncle suddenly  had a heart attack and passed. All this loss has shown me how precious life is. I cried countless nights for my loved ones. I refuse to be depressed about it. I know that God has a plan for us all. 

Today, I spent time with a dear friend and he showed me what closure feels like. Every situation, does not feel the same. Two people can experience the same situation and come out feeling totally different things. Learning to love each person for who they are and not what they bring  creates an atmosphere for pure love.

I have being on this journey to my dayzafter. I have  fallen in and out of love for years since my divorce. I dont regret any experience that I go through, for it teaches me more about me than I have ever learnt in 40 years. 

My dayzafter came in the form of a gentle breeze that brushed right into my life without me expecting it. The gentle kisses, the long steers, the gentle touch and the patient attention. 

I have learnt how patient I need to be with myself. My feelings. My emotions. I learnt how truly happy I am being alone. How happy I am with the sometimes company of Male and the sometimes company of me female. No matter what,  I have become the woman that I have always been. Strong,  bold, caring,  loving and beautiful. I walk into the room and demand attention. That's confidence. I couldn't have done that, had I stayed in the abuse of my ex husband. I stand tall. My presence demands respect and that's a damn good feeling. This is not pride its confidence.  You can have it too. Keep pushing,  keep striving you too will get to your dayzafter.